To quit or keep going? 3 stories of projects I said bye bye to

We often speak about our successes and launches but how about all the times things didn’t quite work out? Here are a few of my quitting stories.

Building a purpose-based business isn’t an easy thing to accomplish. It’s about balancing purpose with profit, and vision with customer service. It’s about finding the right way to do business without becoming someone you don’t want to be.

But, can we really decide who we work with and be picky or is that just an illusion based on social media bullsh*t (#ilovemyjob)?

I’ve quit several gigs while being self-employed.

None of them involved working for a nasty tobacco company or selling my soul. I’ve always been privileged to work with good people and causes (except for my first copywriting gig, where I had to write ads for a testosterone-inducing pill and lure men into thinking it would solve all their masculinity issues, lol). 

My quitting decisions haven’t been easy since they have involved disappointing some nice people, even people I considered friends. I’ve also made these decisions without having another client in the pipeline ready to replace the lost income. 

Basically, you could call them risky decisions. 

So why did I quit?

I’m trying to build a values-based business that relies on my intuition. This choice means I have to claim full responsibility for my choices: good and bad.

If I follow my higher wisdom when deciding which projects I start, I also need to be brave enough to let go of things when they no longer serve me or the client. 

All of my quits have been a consequence of hearing a whisper: “This is not working anymore, and it’ll probably only get worse from here”. That whisper has only intensified the longer I’ve waited. 

I’m a person who needs to to believe in what I do and practice what I preach.

So working while frustrated or after what feels like an expiration date just doesn’t inspire me. And people usually hire me for my inspiration so I need to keep that spark alive. 

So I’ll share my quitting stories with you bring you in on my decision-making journey. 

Quitting Story #1: relationships can expire

I quit a writing gig I had been doing for two years after realising the client relationship had not truly evolved into what I hoped it would be.

The project had started out as a dream project. I got to help a client create an online media, write stories I enjoyed and express and execute many of my creative ideas. However, as the initial funding for the project dried up, my work dimished due to other priorities. The goals for my work became messy, the people I worked with were difficult to reach, and the stories I wrote were published randomly, creating inconsistency and difficulties in measuring results.

There was a weird balance of lack of interest and micromanaging. I tried my best to guess and do a lot of the work for the client until I realised this effort wasn’t appreciated in feedback or in my earnings. Because I did so much of the thinking for the client, I was probably doing a disservice to myself, teaching them that their involvement wasn’t necessary.

Once I tried to raise my pricing, I got confronted with a lot of resistance and questioning. So, after two years, I decided to quit the gig even though the client wished I would have stayed.

I left feeling grateful and proud of all the work I’d done so far and also appreciated myself for knowing when to quit. I continue to be happy to see the company thrive and honoured to have been part of their story. 

My decision-making process: The decision was a simple math on my part that involved counting what I was earning and what I was putting in – not just in terms of time but in terms of energy. This made me realise that I was giving a lot but not gaining the results, appreciation or money that would make it worth the while. I could surely find the same income elsewhere.

But more importantly, I could regain a lot of the energy I was consuming on this project and direct it toward something where my efforts were better appreciated.

I also felt like maybe after two years, this was a good momentum for change, also for the client. Getting someone new to replace me could be exactly what the company needed to inject some fresh energy into the processes and amplify the results. 

Quitting Story #2: knowing when you’re not the right person

I quit a part-time leadership role where I was hired as an outsourced team member to create a strategy and establish new processes to achieve growth in communications. It was a really interesting gig at a mission-driven organisation and gave me a steady source of income.

I still feel very passionate about the organisation’s mission and want to help them achieve it. But, I decided to quit my role because, after 1,5 years of being on the project, I felt like I had achieved the results I came for and established the necessary processes. My job was basically done.

I did it more for the organisation than for myself. I know this sounds too humble to be true, but it is. I take pride in my ability to put my client’s needs above my own, and I want to stay true to this. I knew I was more of a changemaker than a manager, and now, the client needed a manager. 

My decision-making process: I heard the whisper about six months before I called it quits. I took time to think about my decision. When I finally did it, I gave the organisation a three-month notice period and agreed to stay on board for a more minor role, one that made more sense to me and the organisation.

Even though the organisation was disappointed at first, I could see that the changes they started making because of my resignation were moving the team in the right direction. I keep working with this organisation and offer them a new, more focused service than before. 

Quitting Story #3: money does matter

Yoga has always been the element of my business where I get to connect with a live community. So after moving to a new town, I started teaching a yoga class at a local studio to establish a sense of community for myself and connect with new students in the area.

I chose to teach at a studio instead of creating my own group because I thought that would save me the effort of marketing myself.

However, that proved not to be true.

The class I was given was at an awkward time and the studio was also still building their client base. It was difficult to get more than one participant to show up. Week after week, I would prep for the class, leave home an hour before class to drive to the studio and wait to see if people showed up. Some days, no one came.

And as the compensation for the class was based on the number of participants, you can imagine it wasn’t a very profitable gig. On top of this, I was facing some health challenges and had to prioritise where I spent my energy. So, after some months of trying and not seeing an advancement, I quit. I felt sad about it because I appreciated the opportunity the studio owners had given me. But sometimes, a girl must think about her ROI and act accordingly.

My decision-making process: First, I had to take my health seriously and ask myself whether this was something I wanted to spend my limited energy on.

Also, I went back to my original intention for teaching – the community bit, and realised that if I was going to put this much effort into teaching, I might as well do the marketing and sales and build my own community of students. I realised that teaching at a studio had been an escape, a way to avoid doing the “unpleasant tasks” and maybe that was why it didn’t work. Maybe I went in it for the wrong reasons.

So, what could be perceived as giving up was also a wake up call. An invitation to take full ownership of this part of my business. 

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All of this goes to say that quitting doesn’t have to be a negative event.

It doesn’t mean you’re giving up on yourself or the project. Sometimes, things just come to a natural end. Sometimes you must quit something to give space for something new to blossom. And even if the other party is disappointed to see you leave, they will get it at some point, if you’re doing it for the right reasons. 

You can end things with grace.

If you’re a freelancer, coach, consultant or anyone working in project-based work, embodying the sage archetype can be a good way to approach these situations.

You can help your client see their next direction – one that is better than what they’ve been doing so far. And at the same time, you can move on to something that helps you grow and thrive in new ways. Sometimes you can offer the best service by offering no service at all. 

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How to know when to quit?

Letting go of a paid gig, job or a business endeavour eventually comes down to a few key questions: 

• If I let go of this now, will I have the financial resources to support myself? This one is obvious but necessary to think about. I’ve only been able to make values-based decisions in my business because I have a buffer. The buffer gives me the confidence to live in the unknown before something else turns up without getting too desperate (more on the buffer here).

• Is this work helping me become the person I want to be or keeping me stuck being someone I used to be? I perceive our professional life as a path of internal growth. As humans, we’re constantly evolving. So it’s important to recognise when we might be holding onto something that isn’t working anymore. If our passion and desire to grow within the work aren’t there, we’ll unlikely give it our best effort. 

• Have I given this enough time to grow? Even though I encourage intuitive decisions, it’s vital to distinguish intuition from fear. I’ve definitely made the mistake of quitting things because I was afraid or wasn’t patient enough to give them time to flourish. After you first hear the whisper, it’s a good idea to wait some months or even a year (depending on how long your relationship with the project has been) to see whether you’re just going through a rough patch, having an identity crisis or need a bit of rest. All of these can cloud your judgement, and therefore, no big decisions should be made when you’re in the midst of all the emotions. Let the wave pass, and rethink your priorities when you’re feeling calm and centered. 

• Have I expressed what I want? This one is for everyone who is shy about telling others what they really want. If your work is unsatisfying but you’ve never expressed your frustration, maybe the first thing to do is not to quit but to share your feelings. Obviously, this comes down to the culture you’re in and the rensposiveness of whoever is employing you. Sometimes, sharing your feelings can be a waste of energy, but often, it may make you more confident about your decision. It’s your responsibility to share your feelings and wishes with the world and then it’s other people’s choice to either meet your needs or tell you they can’t. 

• Do I just need an attitude shake? Sometimes, we might be seeking something different just because it’s different. And different isn’t always better. So, if we’ve been doing something for a while and feel unmotivated by it, we might just need to recreate something within the project. Maybe we could hire someone to help us develop fresh ideas for the client or bring in a new tool, process or way of engagement. Maybe we could express a bit more of our personality and, in this way, feel more connected with the project? Take a moment to reflect before throwing in the towel. 

• Do I have some ideas or projects that I’ve been hiding under my belt that I can jump on if I decide to leave? Many people stay at unsatisfying jobs because they don’t know what the alternative is. If you have nothing to motivate you moving forward, your energy will likely stagnate. That can make you question your decision over and over again and even cause regret after you’ve decided to leave. Having a passion project to engage with gives you the opportunity to see your choice as an enabler. It can be however big or small, such as studying something new, revamping your CV or starting your own LinkedIn blog. You just need to feel fired up about it.